alchemy of connection
the podcast
Have you ever wished there was a secret handbook to having healthy relationships?
this is the relationship education you never got in school.
Listen on:
Season one
Why we created the pro love movement and how you can join us
What does it mean to be pro love? How do you bring more love into your life and into your relationships? How do you bring more love into the world around you? In this episode, we talk about the Pro Love Movement and we lay out the five steps to having more love in your life and making the world a more loving place. As Dr. Martin Luther King wrote, “love is the greatest force in the universe.”
How to be a visionary in your life and in your relationships
Want to know how to become a visionary in your own life and in your relationships? In this episode we’ll explore why having a vision for your life and relationships is so important and how discovering a sense of meaning and purpose is a vital part of honing your vision for your life. We’ll take you far beyond the realm of vision boards and fantasy into the true power of the imagination to create relationships that are deeply meaningful and satisfying.
On the value of courage, vulnerability, and being brave in love
Why is vulnerability so essential for healthy relationships? And why does vulnerability require courage? In this episode we’ll talk about how to be brave in love and relationships and why vulnerability is vital for emotional intimacy and connection. We’ll dispel the cultural myth that associates vulnerability with weakness and explore reasons why learning how to be vulnerable is one of the best things you can do for yourself and your relationships.
Our best advice for the hard times in long term relationships: what you need to know
Hard times are inevitable in any long-term relationship. In this episode, we’ll explore how to tell the difference between hard times as a good sign that your relationship is deepening and the hard times that indicate that your relationship could benefit from some extra attention. We’ll talk about the transition from the honeymoon phase and why so many relationships run into difficulty making this transition. We’ll also share our tips for navigating challenges in relationships with skill and grace.
The heroic leap of just being yourself: why being authentic feels so risky in relationships
Being yourself in a relationship sounds like it should be easy. So why do so many of us struggle with being authentic in relationships? In this episode, we’ll explore the early messages we receive as children that discourages us from being our whole selves in relationships and uncover ways to step out of the trap of trying to be who you think other people want you to be and instead take the heroic leap of just being yourself in your relationships.
How curiosity in relationships unlocks the potential for more intimacy and connection
Why is it so hard to understand ourselves sometimes? And to understand our partners? What gets in the way of deeper intimacy and connection in our relationships, including our relationships with ourselves? In this episode, we’ll talk about our formula for intimacy and connection in relationships and the vital role curiosity plays in creating vibrant, fulfilling relationships. We’ll also explore why it can be so difficult to maintain a spirit of curiosity in relationships and ways to practice being curious with ourselves and intimate partners.
Compromise is the enemy of happy relationships. Here's why ... and what to do instead.
Compromise is often recommended to couples as the best way to solve problems and resolve conflict in relationships. But compromise can actually end up making relationships worse. In this episode, we’ll talk about the downsides of compromise and why it can be so hard to resolve conflicts in relationships. We’ll also explore better alternatives to compromise and how to work through relationship issues in ways that create more intimacy and connection.
Conflict in Relationships: Why It's Important and How to Do It Well
In this episode, we talk about why avoiding conflict in relationships is a one way ticket to the relationship doldrums. Many of us are uncomfortable with conflict in intimate relationships and friendships. Yet conflict is inevitable in romantic relationships and when you know how to have healthy conflict, it’s actually good for relationships. We’ll explore why we avoid conflict and how to open the door to having the hard conversations in relationships.
Growth in relationships: how to nurture partnerships that thrive long term
Relationships inevitably change over time, but what does a relationship need in order to grow and get better with time? In this episode we dive into why we sometimes resist making changes in our personal lives and in our relationships. We’ll talk about what makes change uncomfortable and why we gravitate toward what’s known and familiar over what’s unknown. We’ll also talk about how to approach growth in relationships in ways that allow us to grow together rather than apart.
What Does It Actually Mean to Have a Happy Relationship?
In our first episode, we explore the central question of what does it mean to have a happy relationship? What makes relationships meaningful, fulfilling, and satisfying? Spoiler alert: it’s not necessarily what you think it is. In the absence of cultural models for what a healthy romantic relationship looks like, we explore the kinds of different expectations we bring into relationships and what happens after the honeymoon phase ends.
Intro to the Alchemy of Connection Podcast
Have you ever wished there was a secret handbook to having healthy relationships? Well, consider this the relationship education you never got in school. Intimate relationships are a vital source of connection, pleasure, meaning, and purpose. They’re also a source of complications, heartbreak, frustration and confusion.
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about us
We help those with painful childhood experiences to heal your relationship with yourself, deeply connect with others, and learn the skills for having fulfilling relationships.
We’re the creators of the Five Relationship Archetypes. We’re also the hosts of the Alchemy of Connection podcast and the creators of the Relationship Yes! Test.
We founded the Institute for Trauma Informed Relationships to provide certification and consultation to therapists and coaches in Trauma Informed Relationship Counseling for Individuals and Couples.
Angela Amias, LCSW
Fulfilling relationships are an essential part of living a good life and yet, many of us (perhaps even most of us) have core wounds from childhood experiences that affect our ability to have the kinds of intimate relationships in adulthood that we long to have. As a licensed therapist, I’ve worked with hundreds of individuals and couples to help them heal past trauma and create more meaningful, satisfying relationships with themselves and with intimate partners.
Alongside Daniel, I developed the Five Relationship Archetypes as a model that reflects the different ways that childhood relationship trauma impacts our adult relationships. This model takes into account our unique and inborn temperaments as well as the kinds of messages we internalize during childhood—about ourselves and how we need to be in order to have relationships with others. And, more importantly, it lays out a path toward healing, by first helping you reconnect with the parts of yourself that you lost along the way … parts that weren’t accepted or safe to express when you were growing up.
It’s my belief that difficult experiences break us open to become more of who we are meant to be. As a trauma survivor myself, and as a therapist, I’ve made it my mission to walk alongside others as you find your path toward healing and discovering a life of more meaning and joy.
I’ve been a featured relationship expert in many publications, including Today, Oprah, Cosmopolitan, Well + Good, The Independent, Salon, Inc., Forbes, Toronto Sun, Women’s Health, Refinery29, and many others.
You can read my full bio HERE.
Daniel Boscaljon, PHD
The most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one you have with yourself. It’s also true that your connections with others can never be better than your relationship with yourself, which is why healing painful or traumatic experiences from childhood is such a vital part of having meaningful, satisfying relationships in adulthood.
My own personal search for how to cultivate a meaningful life came after years of feeling disconnected from others and from myself. Though I entered graduate school focused on the intellectual aspects of earning a PhD in Religious Studies (and then another one in English), I discovered along the way how to use what I learned to repair the inner fractures of my own life. As I reconnected with myself, I found that I was better able to connect with others as well.
As an award-winning teacher with over twenty year of experience working with individuals and couples, my mission is to translate theories of love into practical guidance that helps you create meaningful, fulfilling relationships. I’ve presented internationally on the topics of love and intimacy.
As a relationship expert, I’ve been featured in many publications, including NBC News, Newsweek, Harper’s Bazaar, MindBodyGreen, Forbes, Salon, Fast Company, Business Insider, Fatherly, and AskMen.